First Sentence I Can Find New Yorker Caption Contest!

. . . (wherein I caption the New Yorker Caption Contest cartoon with whatever sentence I first see in whatever book is nearest to me.)

But younger selves refuse to follow older wisdom.

A Pizza Rat For All Time

This is a fascinating document for a few reasons:

1.)  The signature line!

2.)  It reveals that the pizza-franchise-mascot-voicing game is a cruel mistress, as Duncan "Former Voice of Chuck E. Cheese, Forever Child of God Through Christ Jesus" Brannan recently learned.

3.)  The document itself is posted on the Showbiz Pizza website ("Where Everyone Can Be A Kid"), and, despite its having been originally distributed as a Facebook post, it now has a cover sheet asserting Showbiz Pizza's vague sort of copyright authority over it.  Duncan Brannan's Facebook message to his "fans" is now meant "for educational use only"?

4.)  It made me just realize how odd it is that a pizza parlor that, y'know, serves food to people who eat it would think it's a good idea to have a gigantic "joke-telling, sometimes off-color New Jersey rat" as a titular omnipresent mascot--just skateboarding around giving kids X-Treme! cases of bubonic plague.